Feel free to Email me firstname.lastname@example.org
Why do you hate me so?
I'm Carlos I'll be your narrator through this epic journey I call my life*SPOILER ALERT* I die at the end.
LA born and raised, Actor, writer, Bartender.
Star Wars, Girls, Zombies, and music.
Little known Carlos facts:
-I think flaws are what makes a woman attractive.
-Contrary to popular belief I am NOT Mexican
-I don't think threesomes are fun. That's just two dissapointed women I have to deal with.
-I pretend to be sexist, but women usually have control over me.
-I love women with Glasses.
-I once spilled a glass of milk, then proceeded to cry over it.
-I believe we will be attacked by zombies one day
-I think Rats dream of one day becoming squirrels
- I don't like girls that act one way, but are really something different. So if you're really a dude let me know beforehand.
-I don't believe in propper grammer or spellitude.
-I think Pat Bennatar rocks
-I accidentally bought a communist flag once and waved it around in public before finding out what it was
-I don't have a favorite band, because I can't choose between Journey and Weezer
-I'm a horrible singer, but that doesn't stop me from singing all my favorite songs at the top of my lungs
-I can believe it's not butter
- I rent a closet at Robot Arms Apartments.
-I grew to twice my size after eating a mushroom once, but woke up in my underwear in the zoo.
- I though I got my period once, but it just a vodka cranberry I spilled on my lap.
- I like to cut square holes in my pancakes and pretend I made waffles.
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